Love Languages, Quality Time
“Come close to God, and God will come close to you”.
As you know well by now there are 5 love languages and so far we have been through 3 of them.
Today we are going to dive deeper into Quality time and why it is EXTREMELY important that you learn to speak this language even if your significant other doesn’t need it to fill their tank.
You see God LOVES Quality time.
He wants us to spend quality time with him every day. If I had to guess, Quality time would be his main language.
Let’s go back to the basics of the 5 love languages and remember there are 5 love languages.
- Physical Touch
- Acts of Service
- Quality Time
- Words of Affirmation
Let me start by telling you that I have not always been good at speaking the language of quality time.
If you really need to know for sure you can ask Jenna. She will verify that I used to suck at speaking this language.
I suck a little less. Lol
You see, quality time is her main language. When we go for a walk on the beach, or down our road, or spend time together before going to sleep at night it fills her tank quickly.
There are lots of ways to know if someone needs quality time to fill their tank.
One is that when you put your phone down, turn off the tv and talk to them it brings them tons of joy. You can feel the difference in their attitude towards not only you but changes their whole outlook of life.
How can you tell if someone who isn’t that close to you needs quality time to fill their tank?
Here’s how I tell it. I drop what I’m doing when they walk into my office and devote my attention to them. The ones that stick around longer than usual need quality time.
You can flip that too. When you go see someone in their office or cubicle if they stop what they are doing and devote their full attention to you then they most likely need some good ole quality time to fill their tanks.
On a phone call, you can tell those of us who get distracted by all kinds of shiny objects.
When I was traveling all the time for work, I used to have the TV on, be working on our business, and talk to my wife all at the same time.
Needless to say, I was not filling her tank, at all.
Then after reading the 5 love languages and discovering just how ignorant I was, when we would talk while I was traveling I would either go for a walk and talk on the phone or shut everything down while I was talking to her.
Boy did that make a HUGE difference.
By learning to read her signals and learning to truly speak her language I was able to turn a hard situation into one that was a little more bearable.
There was this one guy I used to work with that definitely did not speak or need quality time to fill his tank. (sounds like most guys, I know that quality time about the 4th language)
I would go to his office to talk to him and he wouldn’t even look up from his computer or stop what he was doing. At first, I thought it was just me and that he was too busy to chat.
Then I figured out that he just really wasn’t good at speaking the language of quality time.
God really enjoys it when we spend quality time with him. He wants us to come to him in prayer without distractions.
He wants us to go to church and spend time there with him there. He needs us to spend time with his word without distractions.
And He rewards us when we spend quality time with him. Sometimes the reward is instantly visible. Sometimes it isn’t
One of the main rewards that he blesses me with is confidence and ideas. He gives me the confidence to keep going when it seems impossible. He blesses me with new exciting ideas of how to live a God First Life. (like bringing the author of the 5 Love Languages to Durango, CO 4/9/2022!!!)
Some of us think that we speak the language of quality time, but really we aren’t.
So when you are trying to speak it make sure you get rid of all distractions. Like your phone, the tv, books, distracting thoughts.
If you are distracted then you really aren’t spending quality time with them.
It’s time to take action.
Name 5 people close to you 5 people not so close to you that need quality time.
Don’t stop there though. Now figure out 5 ways for each person (some of them can be the same ways) that you can speak their language and fill their tanks.
One example for your spouse might be to go on more walks together. Or if it’s a coworker you can stop what you’re doing when they come to your office and devote some time to them.
Figure out 3 ways that you can spend more quality time with God!
NOW DO IT!
Is this your language? If so, how can you learn to get others to speak your language without being rude?
Lord, God, Father in heaven we are so grateful for everything that you give unto us. We are beyond blessed with the knowledge and wisdom that you have shared with us. You give us a way to speak so many different languages and to help fill so many other people’s tanks. God, we know that we fill their tank in turn our tank will be filled as well. God, you are amazing and we appreciate you. We know that you don’t have to give us so much, but yet you choose to give us more than we deserve. God today we pray that you would help to remind us daily that we need to spend more quality time with you. Help us to see how we can change our actions to speak the language of quality time to spend more time with you to fill your tank. God maybe that’s writing a story for you, or a devotional, or reading more scripture, or spending more time in prayer, or choosing to see you alive in every aspect of our lives. God, thank you. Lord, today we pray that you give us the courage to take action! Give us the strength to fight Satan when he tries to pull us back into sin and away from spending quality time with you. God give us the courage to tell Satan NO when he dangles “shiny objects” in front of us during our quality time with you. God, we ask all these things in your precious son’s name.
A Little More
There are a few things that I found that I absolutely LOVE. God, enjoying God’s creation (yes this includes people), my family, flying, the ocean, the mountains, warm weather, and helping others.
From a young age, I knew that I liked helping others.
When I was 14 I started as a JR firefighter for our local volunteer fire department.
Before that, I was involved with several organizations where I could help others. Like the Grange, 4-H, and a few others.
I was raised in a strong Christian house and that definitely helped lay a strong foundation for my faith.
But it wasn’t really until I was about 25 that I truly came to God and accepted that he is the reason for everything.
As soon as I accepted that fact my whole life turned around, almost instantly.
And that’s why I spend so much time helping others to come closer to God in everything I do. Sometimes subtly and sometimes not so subtle.
Like around Christmas I tell everyone, Merry Christmas. Even if it makes them a little uncomfortable. Even if they don’t say it back, I don’t let it bother me because I know that maybe, just maybe my faith will cause them to have more faith and belief in Jesus.
Now we run a growing business and non-profit that are devoted to helping others.
Our business, Eclipse DOT and DOT Docs help those who use trucks in their business to be compliant with federal regulations.
We don’t claim to know everything about compliance, but we do promise to do our best to help them be 100% in compliance.
With God First, we are hopefully helping others to live their life with a God First attitude all the time. (Something that I struggle with constantly)
Recently we (Billy, our oldest son, and I) have been taking flying lessons to get our pilot’s license. At first, it was pretty scary to get behind the sticks of a plane, then after a few times, I found it quite relaxing and exciting.
It’s exciting because we are looking at buying a plane so our whole family can travel. On a recent trip to San Diego, all I could think about was how this 12-hour drive could have been done in a little over 2 hours of flight time! Our options for travel which we also love will open up HUGELY!
Here’s the thing.
If I would have never truly accepted that God has a plan for us and that we need to trust him and jump when he tells us to jump none of this would have been possible.
We took some CRAZY chances in the past and are still regularly taking crazy chances and fully trusting that God has it under control.
It’s because we spend quality time with him that we know what we are doing is what he needs us to do.
That quality time is essential to being able to connect with God.
It also makes a huge difference when you can connect to yourself better so that you can see what you need to truly be successful.
I didn’t figure out most of the answers for myself until after I was 25 then I kept figuring them out and I’m sure that I will continue to figure out what I need to do to be happy and healthy.
One of the hardest things we have had to do as we grew was let go of the toxic people that were holding us back. The negative people who all they did was watch the news and tell us about how evil the world is.
Guess what, the world has always had evil in it!
It just wasn’t displayed in every hand and on every TV and heard on the radio.
So here’s what I want you to do today.
Try going on a new sabbatical. Make a pact with yourself not to watch the news for the next week, then the next month, then the next year, then the next 5 years.
That might cause you some stress NOT to watch the news and KNOW what is going on around the world. But I promise you, you will not miss out on anything that is vital to your survival if you don’t watch the news.
Well, that story took a turn that I wasn’t expecting. But like I always say, God has a plan, we might not like the plan, we might not know the plan, but he has one, and it’s WAY better than ours is.
Have a GREAT day and may God bless everything you engage in!
Will you pray with us?
Mankind throughout the world throughout our current situation
All Law enforcement and emergency response personnel
For all military personal serving our country and their families
Those in Leadership positions throughout the world
Lord, today we come to you with HAPPY hearts. We are so grateful that you give us the opportunity to change the lives of those around us. We are grateful that you give us the wisdom to change our lives and the lives of those around us. And you make it so simple. We can do it with a single smile. God today I would ask that you help us to smile more. The next time we see someone down, help us to smile for them. The next time we are down, help us to remember that you gave us the best gift ever. The ability to know you, your son, and the holy spirit. God, we are so grateful for everything you give us.
We ask all these things in your Precious Son's Name
A Little More
The other day I got a call from one of our clients.
I love talking to our clients so I always smile when I answer the phone.
“Hey Dan, one of my drivers is pulled over and they are saying that our permit doesn’t cover what we weigh. Isn’t that why we hire your team to make sure that these things don’t happen!”
My smile immediately vanished.
I was shocked because my team is amazing. and it’s not like them to miss something like 20,000 lbs on a permit.
So, I asked him, “Who have you been working with, and who was the one who called our team to get the permit?”
To get to the bottom of the problem I needed the details.
They gave me the details.
My next call was to my team. Then after I got the details I got them started on getting new permits to get the problem fixed. I’m a solutions guy, not an excuses guy.
But I NEED to know the real reason why it happened so that we can fix the issue.
My next call was to the driver so that I could see exactly what happened.
I knew he was going to be upset. He was pulled over and they were going to give him a HUGE ticket. I wouldn’t be happy either.
I made sure not to smile when I made the call. I had a serious look on my face. As we chatted I learned that he was the person who gave his weight to our team. I asked where he got the weights from and how in the world they were off by over 20K lbs!
That’s when he told me that he might have gotten the wrong scale ticket from the weigh station where he originally weighed.
Immediately my heart leapt with joy, this is NOT our fault!
Now to get the problem resolved and get this driver back on the road was my only goal. I was not going to assign blame or make anyone feel bad.
Hey, we all make mistakes. I do it multiple times every single day.
The owner of the company shot me a text. I'm getting permits from the big guys. They won’t make these mistakes that cost me time and $$$$$.
No problem. Let me know if you need anything. We are here to help.
After they called the “BIG Guys” they called me about 30 minutes later.
Hey, we can’t get an Idaho permit until Monday. It’s Friday night. And we need to drop this load off tomorrow afternoon.
I told him that I would NOT make any promises.
But my team went to work!
We got the permits that the “BIG Guys” couldn’t get.
My team had the Idaho permit in less than 20 minutes. For the right weight this time.
Here’s the point of all this.
When things don’t go right, smile. I have taught my whole team this.
That right there is how we got the permits. They smiled as they worked and it didn’t take any time at all.
Ok, there might be a little knowledge that went into this too. Lol
Next time you need anything DOT, don’t call the “Big Guys” , call the team who can get it done!